I was standing at the crosswalk, waiting for the light to change so I could cross. My audiostream was playing Johnny Zhivago's new album NEW NEW NEW NEW NEW and my video feed was playing something from PBS-MSNBC. Another subway shooting in Tokyo blah, blah, blah, blah... The light changed and I was about to step off the curb when CRASH! two commuter buses hit each other head on fifteen feet in front of me. I was a little dumbfounded and just stood there for a moment as they both burst into flames, then my audiostream was interrupted and I snapped out of my daze. At first I thought I was listening to the theme from Sunday/Monday Night/Morning Football and then realized it was something different.

There was a streak in the sky, like a flash of light and then the music in my audiostream swelled and Captain Mondo was standing in front of me. I'd heard of him and watched his videos, but never seen him in person. He bore a large "M" on his chest along with the brand for Monsanto-McDonald's-Google on each enormous shoulder. My audiostream went silent as he used his SuperCoolBreath™to put out the fires. My videofeed started autoposting links to his previous feats that had been caught on tape along with ads for McDonald's ("Trillions Pleased"™) and Monsanto ("We Make Your Life Fuller"™). He tore the side off of one of the commuter buses and dashed back and forth, depositing commuters on the sidewalk. Seconds later he had done the same to the second bus and there were two dozen dazed and slightly injured people standing or sitting on the sidewalk, unsure of what had just happened. I realized that somehow my videofeed had been recording this. I knew I had never sent a command, but something or someone had auto-triggered it. The security was supposedly unbreakable as it was connected to your DNA sequence. It was said that only the root user could send and receive commands... of course, everything can be hacked if you know how.

The whole episode must have been over with in under a minute. Then the Captain turned to the crowd and I heard him with my real ears and in my audiofeed. His words also scrolled across the bottom of my videofeed as he spoke them.

"THIS ACT OF HEROISM BROUGHT TO YOU BY MONSANTO-MCDONALD'S-GOOGLE! WE MAKE YOUR LIFE FULLER THRU ANALYTICS AND GREAT FOOD!™ HAVE A GREAT DAY CITIZENS!"

He took off into the sky and that was it. These genetically modified superheroes are really something. Maybe someday someone will make one without corporate sponsorship.